Update: Oops... There's No Conspiracy
Fake News written by on Friday, November 20, 1998
Yesterday, I broke into this website to expose what I thought was a hideous conspiracy plotted by Humorix editor James Baughn. Oops, I was wrong. Sorry about that. Baughn is not a Microsoft Secret Agent and there is no conspiracy (at least not now).
I jumped to conclusions based on the spotty evidence I had gathered by tapping Baughn's phone line and rummaging through his trash. It seems that I had tapped the wrong phone line. Instead, I was listening to the local TV station producer's phone conversations. Apparently there is a conspiracy to plant subliminal message on TV to compel viewers to murder people so the station can fill up their local news broadcasts. Obviously this was one big misunderstanding. Now that I've been set straight I feel so much better.
One piece of evidence that led me to believe Baughn was on the Microsoft payroll was the strange stuff he kept getting in the mail from them. As it turns out, someone signed him up to receive free Internet Explorer 4.0 CD-ROMs as a prank. And here I thought Microsoft was sending him top-secret documents via CD-ROMs! What a shmuck I am!