Experts: Google Behind Schedule Producing This Year's April Fools Day Gags
Fake News written by on Friday, March 18, 2011
SOMEWHERE IN CALIFORNIA -- Industry observers have expressed serious concerns that Google may be unable to produce enough quality April Fools Day hoaxes for 2011. If true, this setback could send shockwaves throughout Silicon Valley.
"They've been procrastinating," explained a former Google employee who happened to be available for an interview. "People always think that it's easy to slap together a few webpages and build a cool AFD gag. But it's hard work, requiring weeks of planning and preparation for each one!"
Google, which averaged only one good April Fools hoax per season during the company's early years, has ramped up production, manufacturing almost two dozen April 1st events in 2010. This rapid growth rate may not be sustainable.
"There's only so many Toilet Internet systems and ASCII art filters that you can make up before you completely run out of ideas," explained Flunn Kee, director of the Institute For Advanced Humorological Studies. "I mean, look at Humorix... they went gangbusters for a few years and then the editors disappeared on lunch break for several years. That was no lunch break... they just ran out of humor ideas! The same thing is happening at Google."
Based on recent trends, Google should produce approximately twenty-seven April Fools hoaxes for 2011. "That's a ridiculously high bar," Kee said. "I'm hearing plenty of rumors that the engineers at Google are way behind their production schedules. The company is quickly going to face the cold, hard reality of Moore's Law."
Not the famous Moore's Law, but a lesser-known variation coined by an entirely different Moore. His law states: "The number of good ideas in the universe is finite, but shareholders demand that you double your output of good ideas every 18 months -- or else."
"I just can't see them producing that many worthwhile hoaxes without relying heavily on reruns and retreads. They should have stuck with just one good April Fools hijink per year instead of pursuing an unsustainable growth rate. They just can't handle it," Kee said.
If Google falls short of their expected quota, it's not clear if competitors will be able to fill the void. "In our meme-obsessed culture, the demand for instant gratification in the form of humor, pranks, and hoaxes is through the roof," ranted one sociology professor. "If Google can't deliver, it's going to represent a huge blow to American -- nay, world -- culture. Other industry titans, such as Facebook and Microsoft, just don't have the production capacity for quality April Fools Day output."
On the other hand, not everybody is worried about the looming April Fools shortage. "Google has plenty of smart people. I bet they have an entire division that focuses on nothing but doodles and April Fools Day inventions," said a random person we contacted on Facebook. "They can handle the challenge."